If I were you
When Sara McMillan finds a stack of journals in a storage unit, she’s shocked and enthralled by the erotic life the writer led. Unable to stop reading, she vicariously lives out dark fantasies through Rebecca, the writer—until the terrifying final entry.
Certain something sinister has happened, Sara sets out to discover the facts, immersing herself in Rebecca’s life. Soon she’s working at the art gallery Rebecca worked at and meeting Rebecca’s friends. Finding herself drawn to two dangerously sexy men, the manager of the gallery and a famed artist, Sara realizes she’s going down the same path Rebecca took. But with the promise of her dark needs being met by a man with confident good looks and a desire for control, she’s not sure anything else matters. Just the burn for more.
“If Saturday night proved anything, it was that once I was with him, under his spell, he could demand anything of me and I’d comply. He could push me to the edge, to unbelievable placed I’d never thought I would go.” –Rebecca
Sara McMillan can’t seem to stop thinking about those journals. Journals belonging to Rebecca; a woman who led two very different lives…and went missing. Sara’s neighbor, Ella, purchased a storage unit at auction and upon rummaging through the contents, stumbled across Rebecca’s most private, erotic thoughts written in four journals. Sara, being ever curious, reads one and immediately makes it her mission to find this woman she is sure is in danger. Finding out she worked for a well-known gallery in the city, Sara starts there.
“The art does not always mimic the artist. You never know the real person until you slide beneath their surface.”
Impressing the owner of the gallery with her knowledge of art and helping to make a sale during a charity event, Sara is offered a job doing exactly what she loves…what Rebecca did too. Mark, the arrogant, domineering and gorgeous owner sees a familiar spark in Sara and can’t help but want her. He’s not the only one…Chris Merit, Sara’s favorite local artist also takes notice and is quite smitten. He is a direct contrast to Mark; except he too oozes control and power. But unlike Mark, Chris has a warmth to him that makes Sara hyper aware and comfortable in his presence.
“Je parle espagnol, francais, italien, et j’aimerait beaucomp dess inezvous a nouveau. Modele por moi, Sara…” “I said that I speak Spanish, French, and Italian.” He leans closer, and his eyes find mine. “And then I said that I would very much like to paint you. Pose for me, Sara.”
Not wanting to see this for more than it is, Sara doesn’t agree right away; but she does agree to a no-strings-attached, live in the moment kind of thing, which seems to work for Chris too…for now. What neither of them realize is that they both want control. Chris never loses it and Sara never gives it up. Despite his warnings to keep Sara away from him (and his dark secrets), he just can’t get enough and therefore cannot leave her alone. Not that Sara wants that, as a matter-of-fact, she’s never wanted someone so much. But Sara has a few secrets of her own and she’s just as afraid of Chris walking away from her as he is…and taking her fragile, guarded heart with him.
“He was right. He’s dangerous. Or maybe he didn’t say dangerous. I’m not sure why he’s warned me away so much, but I’ll say it for him. He’s dangerous and I’ve never wanted to live on the edge more in my life.”
“And how do I make you feel?” “Alive,” I whisper without hesitation. “You make me feel alive.”
In the midst of searching for answers regarding the journals and Rebecca, Sara falls unexpectedly for the sexy artist/bad boy with deep rooted control issues. Finally deciding to open up to him and go all or nothing with a man who thrills her in ways she never thought possible, Sara shares her past. Chris reacts much better but she’s still not completely sure of their relationship…he’s not quite ready and may never be ready to share his deepest and darkest…Sara just might have to learn those things on her own.
“It’s not about making you feel better. It’s about the truth Sara, baby,” he strokes my cheek, “this ‘crazy’ thing you’re making me feel is the best crazy I’ve felt in a long time. I’m not ready to let go of you. I don’t know what you’re doing to me, Sara, but please…don’t stop.”
But there is always more…Sara still has the journals and a mission to find Rebecca. Revealing this to Chris is her ace-in-the-hole, sure to send Chris running in the other direction. Again, he surprises her with his reaction and the flame of their passion is ignited further. He wants her to fully understand the life Rebecca led and she wants him to show her. What’s more is the genuine concern Chris has, not just for Sara but for Rebecca too. She seems lost in the pages of those journals and Sara is determined to find answers…now she has Chris’ help; but with help from a man like Chris has its price.
“Get in the car, Sara, or I swear to you I’ll pick you up and put you there myself. You are going to see for yourself who and what HE is, and stop pretending you don’t know already.” “And since you’ve proclaimed yourself as worse…I suppose now is when I get to see your deep, dark secrets too?”
Ok, totally not what Sara expected and she’s completely taken aback by what is revealed to her. Choosing to leave, Sara goes back to her own apartment and does everything she can to move forward…but she loves Chris and that makes leaving so difficult, no matter what his secrets are.
Determined to find answers to the ever-growing list of questions Sara as about Rebecca, she decided to go back to the storage unit in search of something that will bring her closer to finding out what happened. It’s late and dark, everyone is gone and the storage facility is just a little eerie. Steeling her resolve, Sara goes in and gain starts to search for clues when the lights go out…
Um, wow. I cannot even describe how I feel right now. This book was amazing, I could not put it down. My emotions were all over the place and my mind on overload with unanswered questions about so MANY different scenarios, people, places…in short, I loved it! Lisa Renee Jones is a fantastic writer and this book is the start of one amazing rollercoaster ride of a story. Brilliant, I cannot wait to read more!
**5 Art-Loving Stars**