Monday, May 04, 2015

Blogger Review -- Hitchhiker

Lonely and lost, I knew I had to leave, even though I didn’t know where I was headed. Driving without a purpose, I let the roads lead. I was just a shell of my former self, devoid of feelings. Hoping I’d find the missing pieces of myself along the way. 

Then I saw him—those menacing deep brown eyes, and an air around him that was formidable. I knew that picking up a hitchhiker was a dangerous thing to do, but I was desperate. 

Desperate for what, you ask? 

To feel.

Hitchhiker © Stacy Borel
“The heart sees what’s invisible to the eye.”- H. Jackson Brown Jr.

                It’s funny how life takes you through different twists and turns. As children, we don’t think, “When I grow up, I want to be in a relationship where it seemed like a fairy tale in the beginning, but sadly I’m soon undervalued and pushed aside. Then I think I want to find a stranger on the side of the road and fall in love with him. I want him to take me down a dark and dangerous path that could potentially destroy me and make me mentally unstable.” Could you just imagine if we knew then what we know now, after having lived through hell? What paths we would have avoided just to prevent the struggle and heartache? Would you still pick the same course so you could feel it, just once? To know what it was really like to love someone with your very essence, only to have it ripped away? The burn, the loss, the grief, the dry crusted tears on your face? The earth-shattering moment you knew you were well and truly gone and never coming back? Or would you choose safety—the known, monotonous days—and comfort? 

                I think if I were given these options all those years ago, I would have picked the second one. As humans, we crave safety and routine. However, having lived through the moments when I thought my next breath would be my last without him by my side… I’d pick the pain. Why? Because it was real. I fought a hard and valiant battle to deny the lust and passion, as if I had a choice. I didn’t step into it with my eyes closed. Oh no, they were wide open and saw the road signs that glared in my face. 

                Dead End.
                No Outlet.
                Not fucking happening.
                You’re fooling yourself.
                This will kill you.

                You see, my heart knew what it wanted. It claimed him. The law of attraction did not give me a choice in the matter. That battle that I fought, it wasn’t with him. It was with myself. I tried to go back and remember what it was like before I met him. Who I was, how I acted, how I spoke, the patterns of my life. There was no remembering anything. That girl was gone. The girl I am now… well, I am still falling down a rabbit hole. And this bitch is a bottomless pit.


“I was no longer the girl who went with the flow and smiled at everything. I was a stranger living in a body that I recognized but wasn’t mine. I had disconnected so much that it was as if my soul stood outside of my body, waiting for me to realize that this was who I was now.”

Determined to find herself again, after years of suppressing everything she had been for the happiness of others, Chandler takes off from her pristine shell of a life in Maine without so much as a word to anyone but her best friend. Needing time to get away without being chased and brought back to the life she hated, words were few and far between. 

As she drove aimlessly, her heart subconsciously knew exactly where it was going…back to a time and place when life was simple, happy, and everything her current existence wasn’t.  Never did she imagine that along the way she’d cross paths with one person who could see past the careful fa├žade she lived behind for so long…

Never did she think that the numbness she felt for so long could be melted by a simple hitchhiker…

“He trusted me at this moment, and I trusted him. I couldn’t really call him a stranger any longer. It was not the length of time that you knew someone that made the relationship but the connection. I felt connected to Dawson—right here, right now.”

As I was reading this book, I connected with Chandler on some strange level. Knowing what it’s like to be “on” all the time is exhausting. I don’t care who you are, sometimes separation is the best medicine for finding oneself in a world where no matter how far you go, you are connected in some way to the people in your life. She needed away from that…and that takes courage. Most people would just continue to exist. Chandler chose a different path and in that journey she discovered things about herself.

Did she appear weak? Sometimes. But everyone does at some point.  Did she come across as a doormat? Not in the least. Choosing to allow Dawson his so-called indiscretions was a bit stupid, almost making it seem as though she were trading one life of catering for another, just on a different level…but she grew. She realized her patterns and corrected them. What I loved is that it seemed too little too late…

“You don’t chase and I don’t beg.”

Stacy Borel did a great thing with this novel. Even though most people wanted and expected something else, she held true to herself, her characters, and which voice was screaming the loudest. I applaud her for this, because no doubt it brought out the haters. I absolutely enjoyed reading Hitchhiker and felt it was a fresh spin on a forbidden/mysterious romance. I never once felt cheated or that I was missing something in this book. Yes, there were parts that seemed confusing (her flashbacks) because it needed some sort of separation but I laughed it off because at the end of the day, I figured it out pretty quick that I wasn’t in fact missing a piece of the story or that she jumped ahead to something entirely different.  It was a simple error…and since I read so many stories with errors, this one seemed minor. The style was great, grammar and flow were spot on; I fell into the pages of this book and never once looked up until the last page was turned. To me, that’s pretty damn good.

**5 Taking the High Road, Stars**

I'm a Coast Guard wife and currently a stay at home mom. I want to be a nurse when I "grow up." My incredibly handsome husband and I have been married for 9 years and I have 2 amazing children that keep life interesting. 
I am an obsessive reader. I go through 3-5 books a week on my Kindle and I whole-heartedly support my indie authors. After reading well over a couple hundred books this year, I decided I might give it a shot writing my own book. I dabbled with a few ideas and finally settled on a story I know I'd personally read and I began the journey of creating Ever Enough. I appreciate all the support I've been given by my family, friends, and fellow indie authors. You've all shaped my view on life and books and I'll be forever grateful!

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